Hi there, big kid ❤
So… school is starting again soon.
And maybe you’re feeling excited.
Or nervous.
Or both at the same time.
That’s totally normal – lots of kids feel a little (or a LOT) nervous when it’s time to go back to school and guess what? That feeling is actually trying to help you.
Your brain is like a puppy – but sometimes it gets a little jumpy
One important part of your brain is called the amygdala (say it like this: ah-MIG-da-la). The amygdala is like a guard dog – its job is to keep you safe from danger. Just like a guard dog would bark and bark and bark if there was a bad guy trying to steal your mom’s flowerpots, or if someone left the water running and a pond was forming in your kitchen – if your amygdala thinks something might be dangerous or different or confusing, it goes:
“WARNING! ALERT! Let’s get ready to FREAK OUT!”
But just like my dog has a hard time telling the difference between a bad guy coming to steal my mom’s flowerpots, and my nice mail carrier coming to BRING me an Amazon package…sometimes your amygdala has a hard time telling the difference between a situation that is dangerous, and a situation that is just new.
Starting school isn’t dangerous—it’s just new.
So when your amygdala starts saying, “WARNING! ALERT! Let’s get ready to FREAK OUT!”, instead of running away or yelling at your dad when he asks you to get ready for school, you can say:
“Hey brain, thank you for trying to help me. I’m okay. I can handle this.”
That’s called talking back to your worry voice—and it’s one of your superpowers.
Let’s talk about your “safety siren”
You know how your mouth gets dry or your tummy feels wiggly or your hands feel sweaty? That’s from something I like to call the safety siren – it’s your amygdala’s way of trying to get your body ready for action, so you can run away or hide or fight a bad guy.
Having the safety siren when a situation is actually dangerous, is helpful because it helps you be stronger and run faster. But when a situation is just new and not dangerous, the safety siren makes it hard to think clearly.
So how do we turn off the siren?
Try these tools when you feel nervous:
1. Breathe like a balloon
Put your hands on your belly.
Breathe in through your nose while you count: 1… 2… 3…
Breathe out through your mouth: 3… 2… 1…
Do that three times. Feel a little calmer? That’s your body saying “Thank you!”
2. Talk to a helper
Tell a grown-up or a big kid you trust:
“I’m feeling a little nervous about school.”
Grown-ups can help remind you of all the things that are going to be okay. Plus, talking to someone kind helps your brain know you’re safe.
3. Make a “Brave Plan”
When we have a plan, our brains feel calmer. Here are some things to plan for:
- What time will you wake up?
- What’s for breakfast?
- What’s in your backpack?
- What will you do when you walk into school?
You can even draw your plan with pictures if that helps!
4. Bring a comfort item (if it’s okay at your school)
Some kids bring a tiny object in their pocket (like a smooth rock, a fuzzy pom-pom, or a note from a grown-up) to help them feel brave. You can give it a squeeze when you need to remember you’re loved.
5. Remember: Brave doesn’t mean NOT scared
Being brave means doing something even while you’re a little scared.
You are already brave, just by trying.
💛 A note from me to you
You are strong. You are growing. You are doing something new. And I am really proud of you for being brave!
It’s okay to have big feelings. ALL feelings are welcome – even the hard ones.
And even though school might feel a little weird or hard at first, you’ll figure it out. I believe in you.
And if you ever need a grown-up helper, we’re here. Always.
You’ve got this ❤
(And your grown-ups are so proud of you.)
Love,
Dr. Halie (a feelings doctor who thinks you’re the best)
